...go on as you never have...

"It is impossible for you to go on as you were before, so you must go on as you never have. It’s wrong that this is required of you. It’s wrong that your son died. It will always be wrong. The obliterated place [from your son's death] is equal parts destruction and creation. The obliterated place is pitch black and bright light. It is water and parched earth. It is mud and it is manna. The real work of deep grief is making a home there." Sugar; Dear Sugar